Okay, i'm only giving myself 15 minutes to write tonight becasue it's late and I've spent the last three hours trying to put up Anita's birhtday pictures so everyone can see them and my computer keeps crashing, so you'll have to wait until I have more time and patience tomorow to see the pictures...sorry.
Today started off good. I woke up to puppy wanting to come up into my bed. I pushed the snooze and she snuggled up with me until the alarm went of again. Got out of bed and into the shower, put on CHOM, "Old time rock&roll" was on and I got jiggy in my underpants a la Tom Cruise....Then things got bad...I was running late and had to run to the train and I hate rushing..hate it. Had to get coffee instead of tea. That's how tired I was..I thought it was a good idea, that is until my stomach started doing backflips, but Pepto Bismol to the rescue! Anyways, the day was getting better until a certain friend came to visit. I don't know what it is but lately this person has been getting on my nerves. I'm sure she doesn't do it on purpose but she always manages to make me feel like total shit....like a nothing. We were really close a few years ago but since she went a way and got fucking married, she's really different in the way she thinks/acts/talks and her priorities have changed too. I know that it's normal to grow apart from your friends but IT SUCKS! I just can't seem to relate to her anymore. For her, you NEED to have money, you NEED to have a husband/boyfriend, you NEED to have a university degreee, you need a CAREER. But her ideas of a career are alll buisness related. She doensn't consider make-up artist a career, or visuals at gap a career. She thinks that everything "artsy" isn't a job, just a hobby and you wont get anywhere doing it, she said the same thing about graphic design...I mean WHAT THE FUCK? Anyways, back to my day..she comes in and already I'm not in the best of moods, I was feeling very sensitive, and she comes in and right away points out my "friends" (pimples) and makes a comment about how tired I look and at least I don't have to work hard today (meaning my job doesn't require much effort). Then she goes on about how she looked in her bank acount and she had ALL this money in it and she couldn't figure out where it was from and blah blah fucking blah..... She knows very well that her husband put the money in her account, even I knew that....she's just saying it to say she has money.. I realize I'm probably being far too sensitive about all this but my day was sucky and now I'm complaining so just let me..... After she left, I lost it and cried for a while because I was fed up of her making me feel "less than her" when really all I am is different than her. I don't think she sees that just because I don't live life like she does, I can be happy too. I could go on but I would only be bitching and making her seem really bad, which deep down she isn't, we just aren't the friends we used to be. I still like talking to her and going out but it'll never be like it used to. And I know that I've been able to deal with that fact, but I'm not sure she even realizes how different she is now....maybe it's me that's different, either way, we've just grow appart.....and it does make me sad cause we used to be so close and have so much fun, but now I feel pushed away, second, which I am I guess. Maybe it's me who's envious of her and I just don't know it....fuck it, who knows anyway, I just wanted to get that off my chest, that's all, and now I have andI feel better. Thanks.

I'll get thise pictures up soon, I promiss. I've got to go make lunch club for tomorow (pinaple terriyaki tofu on rice, no sandwhiches sorry Anita) and sew a shirt I bougth today so considering that it's 21h10, I'd better get on the ball.....